The Ten Commmandments...that my son has given me

1. You shall not tell me what to eat/drink, or when to eat/drink or for that matter, how to eat and drink what I want. I will eat noodles with my hand and soup with my fork. You shall also not tell me what I can't eat. If I want to eat the dirt off the floor, it's my will.


2. You shall not take me to the park when I want to stay home and play with the toys, and you shall not tell me to play with the toys when I want to watch my rhymes on TV.


3. You shall not decide what I will wear to the playschool. I will not wear a jacket even if it's cold because it hides the cars on my t-shirt. I shall try out at least three sets of dresses at morning rush hour before I decide the colour code for the day.

4. I know you work six days a week. But that does not mean you can rest on Sunday. It's the day I poop most and decide not to have lunch. It's a holiday. I shall give eating a break. You shall not nap in the afternoon because it's the one day i get to see you at that time. You shall scream, roll on the floor with me, growl, and be my fellow-lion at the zoo. And yes, I'll have the privilege of giving you with a pretend-hairwash.


5. You shall not covet my Maggi, my ketchup or my chocolates, my story books, my chips and my grandfather.

6. You shall listen to my babbling for 45 minutes every night before bedtime, even if you are ready to snore. You shall not pretend to listen and catch a few winks...I'll catch you at that game any day.

7. You shall not interrupt the interesting conversations and games that grandpa and me share. I shall scream my head off if you dare do so. But you shall allow me the privilege of being part of every conversation you and daddy have, sitting in between you both and occassionally giving your conversation a much-needed break with my rhymes.

8. You shall hand over all your jewellery to me as soon as you return from work. First I will try them on, then I will play with them, rub them on the floor to see what happens to them etc. I shall try to pierce you with the earrings and use your necklaces as whips.

9. You shall not hug, nay, not even touch daddy or grandpa or grandma. You are mine entirely. You shall not hug my cousins or the neighbour's kids. Or anybody else. You're mine.

10. You shall accept me with all my tantrums, smiles, hugs, kisses, stubbornness, screaming crying, gooey nose just as I have accepted you with your temper, spanking, smiles, cuddles, dirty scary stares and pampering.