Vegetarian avocado recipe - a simple sandwich spread

I'm really excited. Today's the first time I made something with avacado (butter fruit) at home. It took me five minutes to make, that's the best part of it...

And what a day to make it. It is Varamahalakshmi pooja today. We don't do an elaborate pooja, so I had time on my hands. But this is the fastest thing to make.

A colleague had given me a ripe avacado from her friend's garden. So I couldn't keep it a day longer -- it was RIPE.

I've eaten avacados at restaurants and at friend's places, but never made it myself.

Didn't know it was this simple.

Here's what I did:

1. Halve the avacado

2. Discard the seed and the brown skin around it if it's stuck to the pulp

3. Scoop out the fruit/pulp with a sharp steel spoon

4. I mashed it with the spoon once -- it was easy and smooth

5. Add salt to taste, a pinch of sugar, some fresh ground pepper, finely chopped fresh coriander (kothambri), squeeze in a dash of lime (all this to take away it's slightly bitter after-taste).

You can add mashed green chillies for fire. I didn't because I was hoping to con Sonny Boy into eating it. You can also add in some mashed garlic pods and finely chopped raw onion for crunch (these two elements were a no-no today, it being a festival)

6. I also added some fresh cream (it was around in the fridge), and grated in some cheese - just for effect :-)

7. Spread this on a slice of bread, top it with finely chopped capsicum/green bell pepper and finely chopped ripe tomatoes. You can use any other vegetable/greens of your choice. This is just what I quickly did. I think boiled potato will work well.

8. I sprinkled some more salt

9. I closed it with one more slice of bread, also spread with the avacado mix on the inside

10. Toast it in one of those plug-in electric toasters/sandwich grills

I LOVED THE RESULT. Had a yummy breakfast...with tomato ketchup

I guess you can use your imagination and add anything to the avacado mash -- garam masala, dhania/jeera powder and turmeric, maybe chopped spinach, olives, ajwain....i don't know -- i'm going to try other combos soon

Avacados apparently consist of "good fat", multi-vitamins, specially Vitamin K and folate. It's high calorie, yes, but worth its weight in nutrition too, so it's fine i guess.

Started another blog... my weight loss attempts

I suddenly realised, after I started a new blog that I'm just some 10 days from the fisrt anniversary of this blog!

I've been travelling again (yes I left Sonny Boy again with my parents to travel on work for two days) and thinking a lot with the time on hand. I've decided to do something about my health in a positive direction. Staring with a decent amount of food control, exercise and hopefully some weight loss. And in the long run I hope I get healthier.

Dedcided to start a new blog for it as I didn't want to mix things up with this blog.
So here's the link -- I've not done much with it yet. Hope the blogging keeps me motivated to stay on track this time at least.

http://www.waitingtoloseweight.blogspot.com/

Malnad Mela in Bangalore - Feb 5 and 6

Ok, I'm not a person big on product promotion, but when it comes to promoting something good from the land, for the people, I don't mind going all out. I'm a staunch believer of hand-made products, handloom and handicraft, local food produce...so I try not to miss these events

And while I'm on the subject please also go to Harshakala 2011, the annual handloom exhibition supported by the government, at Palace Grounds, Gayitri Vihar, till Feb 8, 10 am to 9 pm. You will find an excellent collection of saris, carpets, bedsheets, among other things.

Now, going back to what I started talking about, I got a mail from a colleague announcing the Malnad Mela -- it promotes earthy products from the western ghat region of Karnataka, called "Malnad".


I'm uploading here the poster they have forwarded, and pasting here the text of their e-mail. Please do visit if you are interested in forest products, seeds, food products, handmade home products etc.

THEIR MAIL :
 " The theme for this year is food gardens, seed saving, and recycling.

We will have the following displays/stalls from the malnad and from a variety of organizations in Bangalore and elsewhere:

1.   Vanastree’s range of seeds, garden produce & traditional malnad foods and snacks ( honey, kokam nectar, tambli,  
       podis, todadevu, pickles, preserves and more), non-foods and crafts (kokam butter balm, patchwork quilts and runners,  
       cashew resin wood paint, insect repellents, seed jewelery, vegetable hair dye, soap nut scrub,
       cotton shopping bags with an earth logo and others)
2.    Malnad snacks and drinks stall  (sweets, savouries, kokam juice, and kashaya to keep you going)
3.    Exhibition of photos and posters on the malnad gardeners, food gardens, and vegetable diversity
4.    A Hundred Hands with traditional and contemporary crafts
    5.    Namma Bhoomi with handloom clothes and village crafts
6.    Daily Dump with composters
7.    Daman Ganga with recycled tetrapack roofing sheets and paper products
8.    Biome Solutions with dry toilets and a display on ecological sanitation
9.    Bhoomi Network with publications
10.  Vanamitra with films and a display on wildlife, camps in the Western Ghats, and animal rescue initiatives - all this  
       complete with a tent set up for kids!
11.  Falcon Tools with garden implements
   12.   Eco-Save India with solar lighting  
   13.   BG Handmade Paper with recycled paper products

There will be a meeting and skill share space for experienced and aspiring organic gardeners and earth stewards to share notes, and we will help with discussions and queries to the extent possible. Lighting for the mela is with rechargeable LED lamps and solar lights. Our shamianas and sun shades are of recycled parachutes and cloth garden umbrellas. Golden Beads School has generously given us the use of their playground for the mela. We have been running the mela on our own steam, have not sought any sponsorship, and continue to aim to keep this a sustainable endeavor.
ONE SINCERE REQUEST - Please help spread the word and pass this email around to family, friends, and your networks. If you can  make print outs of the attached poster, please put it up  in your apartment complex, neighborhood store, school, college, office, etc. Its always hard to try and reach out to people in Bangalore sitting in Sirsi with sporadic access to email. Many thanks."UNQUOTE

I've shaved and other stories: a quick milestones/achievement roundup of Sonny Boy..Yeah, I can be a proud mom too.

Sonny Boy is going to be two-years-and-four-months old in another 12 days.

As I look back on that, I realise there are so many things about him that I'm proud of, and happy for, for him.
I also realise I crib so often and so much and sound so negativistic here all the time, I'm making a monster of him and myself.

And then I realise he's not so bad, and neither am I. It's just that once I'm done releasing my frustrations on the blog (caused mostly by him and occasionally by hubby) I go back to Sonny peaceful and brimming with love. So thanks "blogging" -- for doing this much -- to allow me let off steam on you, rather than on my son.

Here are a lost of things he does now...I haven't made any scrapbook and i keep no other diary, so I hope this one is "for the record" and is around for me to access when Sonny is, say, 20 and I can tell him embarrassing stories about himself.

1. He's interested in doing things around the kitchen -- he loves peeling peas and togarikaalu, which is in season now. He does it with my grandma.

2. He quite enjoys helping me pluck and sort out methi (fenugreek greens). And i must say he does a dedicated job of it.

3. He can pull on his own nickers and pants after doing the loo round. And if there's enough time, he can even peel them off before heading to the loo. After a bath, he likes to wear his pants himself. That's way better than fighting wearing any clothes at all!

4. He can make up and tell stories. And very cute ones at that. He's inspired by the Panchatantra stories. Most of the characters in the stories are animals. And interspersed with them are his playschool teachers! Most of the animals have a upaaya (idea)! And once he finishes the story, he'll say "ashtey" (that's it) to hint to us that we must shower our appreciation. And he can't wait...so he'll follow "ashtey" with "CLAP!" (He told me four stories back-to-back before going to sleep this week, one night.)

5. He's singing rhymes like crazy -- mostly in English and Kannada and some in Hindi. He's picking up about two a week.

6. He is also beginning to deliberately distort language -- he sings rhymes with all words ending with the same sound. Or beginning with it. And enjoys everyone's amusement or irritation at it. He knows he's singing it weird and loves the sound of it.

7. He talks to his Teddy Bear -- this morning he was teaching Teddy to count out coins from a box. He even wanted to take Teddy along for a haircut.

8. He's showing more and more interest in eating by himself. Messy, prolonged, process. But boy! Is he interested! Whether to eat with hand/spoon/fork, he's an eager beaver.

9. At the park, he used to be fairly scared if any other child came and stood behind him to climb up the slide and he would just back off and let everyone go, stand and stare. Last week, I was thrilled to see when he went and told an older kid "Please, I'll go first". And the kid let him, and helped him up. He can climb up the wooden "monkey ladder" with ease and confidence.

10. He's got an imaginary friend whom he talks to sometimes...not very clear yet, but he does it sometimes.

11. He loves puzzles and gets tired of doing the same ones pretty fast. I love the excitement with which he puts the pieces together and complains before doing the complex ones saying "idu tumba traas kodattey" (this one troubles me a lot).

12. He brushes his teeth -- no toothpaste. And often drinks the water, much to my irritation. If i ask him to rinse and spit out the water, he loves to swallow it and giggle away.

13. Yesterday, he told me his cheeks were "soft", his hair was "nice". And then when I continued saying his chin was "soft" too, he told me it was because he shaved!!!!!

That, i think sums it up for now. And I love 13, so I'll stop there.

PS: I suddenly realised how "kicked" it feels to be proud of your child's achievements, even as I typed each one out. If you have a kid/s between 2 and 2.5 years and are feeling the same way, do share your pride with me, and I'll create another post to put it all together (just because I'm  in a good mood). Don't forget to put down the child's age, and do mention if it's a boy or girl. If you're a blogger and have already blogged about this (which I'm sure you all have ;-), do mail me a link and I'll see if I can add links too. Cheers!

Festival = food, festival = nostalgia

I swear I wait for festivals to come around mostly for the food it brings with it.

I'm so outright lazy I'll never really cook any of it on my own. But honestly, I don't see the need to, because there are so many generous people around me, piling on the gorgeous fried and sweet food, while I pile on the kilos.

And the first generous person who'll pamper me is mom. Who always invites us over for every festival in her own bastion. Again, I'm not complaining, because I get to enjoy so much food. And don't have to slog in the kitchen for it.

What i do miss, though, sometimes, is the nostagia attached to the process of making it. I still remember learning from my grandmother how to "seal" a kadubu or a modaka for Ganesha. Roll out the little ball of wheat-flour dough, pat on a bit of hoorna somewhat towards offcentre, carefully lift up one edge and pull one half of the dough over to the other edge. Seal the edge with a few dabs of water and then the tricky bit -- what my grandma called "murige haakodu" or literally pleating the edges. The dough had to be gently pinched and twists, and patted down and the whole process repeated all over the moon-shaped kadubu, each pleat folding into the next. It's quite crucial because if it's not sealed right, it breaks open and the hoorna remains uncooked. Over the years, i dare say i became an expert of this process. Provided my mom made the hoorna!! (Ya, ya laugh in my face.)

We usually steam it and not fry (the more popular variety). I used to take great pride in being given the responsibility to make these two dishes for the naivedya for Ganesha. I just don't know why, but this year, we didn't make it. It never struck me till last night and I haven't yet asked my mum "why?"

While I myself don't really cook festive specials, I still feel terrible when I don't get the homemade staples. It's rather rude and demanding of me, yes, but that's what they've made me used to ;-)

Another dish I miss at festivals now is the bhajji. On most festive occasions, we would fry bhajjis -- either potato, or heerekai (ridge gourd). We slowly stopped that saying fried food is not good for health; it's too tedious; there's so much other food anyway. Then slowly, after granny died we started outsourcing other festive food too. We would place orders and have them door delivered to save my mum the trouble.

I still have cousins who'll do the entire retinue of dishes for each festival without fail, and  feel terrible that i never got around to learning them. Still, I'm not exactly motivated to learn either. So i admire all those women/girls/moms who handle all other responsibilities and this too with aplomb.

Ganesha Chaturthi is also when i remember my dear neighbour who used to walk with her head bent the whole evening because then she would surely see the moon. It's a time to stop and wonder why no group of young kids come to "see" the Ganesha in your house, count them, say they are going to see at least 101, take prasada and go. This year, no one came to collect donation for putting up a Ganesha in any neighbouring street either. It's sad. This year, I didn't go to any of my relatives places either to see their Ganesha. I'm as much a part of the changing tide as the others are.

Just how how how...in the world do kids know

1. When to trouble mummy -- when she's already troubled most
2. When mummy will give in to the most unreasonable of demands easily
3. That all things unhealthy taste wonderful and one must be open to such foods always, even if you know     how to clam your mouth tight when you see vegetables.
4. When you've changed the diwan sheets because the guests are coming, so they should spill something on it to leave a mark
5. What exactly to say after they've behaved badly to make mummy's heart melt into one gooey motherly mess
6. How to promise that they'll never do something again, only to repeat it within minutes, and still get away with it?
7. That they'll get the toy they want in the shop by saying just the right dialogue with the perfect expression.
8. That mummy is not really sleeping but pretending to, so that THEY sleep fast, and we can go and sneak off to do other things?
9. That the "uncle" and "aunty" on TV are doing "something" that requires them to look up from whatever they are doing and change their tone of talk instantly?
10. That the best way to stop mummy from feeding them any food is to either threaten to vomit, or actually vomit some? But never feel that way when just seconds later, they see chips?
11. That when you want some things badly you'll surely get it from daddy or grandpa when mummy won't give in
12. How to switch off the TV or change channels even before they learn to say they're going to pee
13. That when you say "You can't have this", you don't really mean it
14. Where to find the dust and dirt in your house and put their fingers in it when you think everything's clean
15. That certain antics of their, however often repeated, will make you smile, however terrible a mood you are in
16. Bad words from good, and the impact of negative words on you
17. How to be single minded in the pursuit of anything -- be it an ant or a game of cricket they want -- NOW
18. how to say something is "cute" even before they know what the hell it means
19. what intonations an variations in pitch to use when they are saying certain things even when they are struggling to pronounce most of it?
20. That they can delay going to a place they don't want to go to by saying "potty" just as you are all dressed up and ready to step out.

Birthday with great-grandmas, balloons, chaat and a 100 people!

Oooooh and I'm back. I'M BACK I'M BACK.

Haven't blogged in sooo long, I'm itching to say soo much. Aaaaaaaaahaa. I think I had withdrawal symptoms.



Sonny Boy's second year birthday bash finally happened (i never did anything for his first year because i thought he would just bawl his head off). So that's where I was slogging my ass off the whole of last week. First, on his actual birthday, we had both sets of grandparents over for dinner at the apartment and I cooked.



And then we threw a party for all those who were dying for us to throw them a party! After five days. To make matters complicated, we had to host the party on my birthday (yes! my husband lives with two Leos). After Hubby cancelled out the first date (he had to travel on work) after the caterers had been fixed, we had to reschedule, find a new caterer, and get things going all over again. So we couldn't invite people till the food was confirmed! It was going to be a chatpata chaat party. Our guest list numbered 125 (yes, we're bloody ambitious).



That was just the beginning of things going wrong. Asked dad to fix up the shamiana because the party was on my parents' house terrace. He got conned into hiring one that the guys said was water-proof. Hah! The rain gods decided to bless us. It poured at the party. Needless to say, the shamiana leaked.



There they were -- my parents' relatives, hubby's relatives, our common friends, a few colleagues, former classmates, cousins, nieces, nephews, and some of Sonny's friends all standing shoulder to shoulder, huddled up under the sheltered area, clinging on to their food! I spent most of my birthday running up and down the stairs, wiping off wet chairs after it stopped pouring, and passing the cake and sweets around. Phew!



Oh and to put the icing on the cake, the power promptly went off for an hour!! A second batch of guests had to eat in stand-by lighting. Hah! All these days there was no rain and power cuts. But what must be must be. We had to have those two slaps placed propah on our cheeks, together.



If you want to know how NOT to throw a party, ask me. I know now! I mean we settled on a do-it-yourself home thingie after we figured out that hiring a party hall and hosting a dinner was way beyond our budget. BUT, and it's a BIG BUT. There's a point to that pricing. I mean i could have comfortably stood, swathed in silk at the entrance of the hotel hall, lording over the guests, smiling and saying my welcome, and actually chatting with them if I'd gone ahead with Plan A.



But now friends are calling up to say they had fun. That the rain offset the spicy chaat and it was a good excuse for getting into a huddle and gossip. Ok, I'm glad I have nice friends who say that to make me feel better about the fiasco. But I was so miserable that night.



Sonny Boy was the charmer, though. Never once cried, except when his paediatrician turned up to wish him!!! Hahaha that was hilarious. Embarrassing for the doc, though. Sonny just shook hands with everyone, played with balloons, loved his elephant cake, and ate puffed rice straight off the chair (yuck, but i had no time to stop him from doing that). He loved it when everyone sang "Happy Birthday..." . He grabbed up all the gifts with gusto. He even sang for me that morning when I told him it was my birthday too. He was an angel. Touch Wood. For once! He loved the fact that his former nanny came to wish him. He was thrilled with the presence of so many kids. He loved the attention and fussing.



OK, so about 20 people didn't turn up. Not bad considering it was pouring crazy. And we invited everyone pretty late in the day. But it wasn't so bad after all, I thought. Sonny spent the second year's beginning with four great-grandmums (yes, we're a LARGE family), his grandparents, uncles, aunts, cousins, friends, masks, balloons, buntings, much noise and music, and of course his favourite -- grandpa.


My sanity's now restored, and after a weekend of opening presents (including a gazillion CARS), I'm back, slogging away at the workplace.

A for akshee, B for blob in nose...T for tonsilitis

Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
I'll never see the proverbial light at the end of the tunnel will I? I mean, I'm forever groping around in the darkness of the tunnel, going around in circles and coming back right there.

If the whole of last week wasn't bad enough for Sunny Boy with the sniffles and the leaky drippy nose, now it's full-blown tonsillitis and a chest congestion. Why-o-why-o-why? The poor soul can barely swallow food. Won't eat much. Keeps sneezing and coughing . I want to really fly up in the sky and pull out dear Sun who's hibernating behind the clouds in Bangalore these days. I mean I haven't seen a bleaker week in my entire life in this city.

But, he's been a good boy and takes in some home remedies very willingly to ease the congestion.

And before I forget, I'm putting down all anyone can do to ease the child during such illness (I keep doing this putting down things for myself, because whenever i ask my mom what she did for me when i was a kid she says she just can't remember. And me being forgetful me, I haven't much hope). I also help anyone else struggling in a similar situation can make use of it and find some relief.

1. Give lots of warm fluids -- ganji/kanjee made of roasted rice and boiled with some daal give sustenance and strength. Is warm soup for the soul and is easy on a swollen throat. Add some veggie from squash family -- pumpkin (white or yellow), or doodhi/sorekai (bottlegourd). Cook it in the ganji and mash so nutrition goes down as masked (hopefully) as possible.
2. Warm water to drink. This must be a fairly cooled down version of water boiled with some turmeric, tulsi and ginger in it -- a light decoction. (Thought he would puke it out. But, as surprises go, he loved it!) Best thing first in the morning.
3. Steam inhalation. Easier said than done. My boy is never going to go through this even if i try conning him, tell him he's going to play with water and steam up the bathroom. That's the ONLY time he doesn't wan to play with water!
4. My friends do this often; I've tried it sometimes and it helps, but my brat just resists everything (so pls understand my frustration as i crib and weep over and over) -- apply some lukewarm milk with a a few strands of saffron as a thin film on chest and forehead. The "heat" of the saffron absorbs the congestion. (For adults we use a mix of ginger/turmeric but that would be too strong on a baby's skin).
5. Another alternative to No. 4 is strapping on a strip of cloth (this is only for the chest) in which you've rolled up some crushed garlic -- some pods with skin peeled and crushed. (I tried this on Sonny Boy, who promptly pulled off strip after much wailing). But if you have a very willing baby (like the rest of the world seems to have) please try it. It eases congestion/phlegm built up in the lungs.

All these are tried and tested grandma's cures used for generations in my or friend's families. Just be careful. Whatever you apply, never near the child's eyes. Best applied after they are fast asleep if they are the rather unwilling kind.

I'm just oh-so-depressed. Can't take leave from work because I have almost none (saving the few for the rest of the calendar year). Can't concentrate on work because I'm thinking of the poor dear. Can't sleep peacefully because I keep waking up when he struggles to breathe.
And just sad, sad sad :-(

The Ten Commmandments...that my son has given me

1. You shall not tell me what to eat/drink, or when to eat/drink or for that matter, how to eat and drink what I want. I will eat noodles with my hand and soup with my fork. You shall also not tell me what I can't eat. If I want to eat the dirt off the floor, it's my will.


2. You shall not take me to the park when I want to stay home and play with the toys, and you shall not tell me to play with the toys when I want to watch my rhymes on TV.


3. You shall not decide what I will wear to the playschool. I will not wear a jacket even if it's cold because it hides the cars on my t-shirt. I shall try out at least three sets of dresses at morning rush hour before I decide the colour code for the day.

4. I know you work six days a week. But that does not mean you can rest on Sunday. It's the day I poop most and decide not to have lunch. It's a holiday. I shall give eating a break. You shall not nap in the afternoon because it's the one day i get to see you at that time. You shall scream, roll on the floor with me, growl, and be my fellow-lion at the zoo. And yes, I'll have the privilege of giving you with a pretend-hairwash.


5. You shall not covet my Maggi, my ketchup or my chocolates, my story books, my chips and my grandfather.

6. You shall listen to my babbling for 45 minutes every night before bedtime, even if you are ready to snore. You shall not pretend to listen and catch a few winks...I'll catch you at that game any day.

7. You shall not interrupt the interesting conversations and games that grandpa and me share. I shall scream my head off if you dare do so. But you shall allow me the privilege of being part of every conversation you and daddy have, sitting in between you both and occassionally giving your conversation a much-needed break with my rhymes.

8. You shall hand over all your jewellery to me as soon as you return from work. First I will try them on, then I will play with them, rub them on the floor to see what happens to them etc. I shall try to pierce you with the earrings and use your necklaces as whips.

9. You shall not hug, nay, not even touch daddy or grandpa or grandma. You are mine entirely. You shall not hug my cousins or the neighbour's kids. Or anybody else. You're mine.

10. You shall accept me with all my tantrums, smiles, hugs, kisses, stubbornness, screaming crying, gooey nose just as I have accepted you with your temper, spanking, smiles, cuddles, dirty scary stares and pampering.

...and the doc said (very sweetly) "you're overweight by ONLY 10 kg" !!!!

Yes, it finally happened. The annual medical do at the workplace where they always tell you to stop eating fried food. To bring down your trigliceride levels. To start exercising. (Yes, I DON'T EXERCISE AT ALL.)

I'm glad i took the test. I'm not complaining. Poor souls from the office, they come and beg us to voluntarily take all tests (including some optionals) and follow it up with a doctor's consultation.

The moment I got on to the weiging scales, I was miserable. Most of my male colleagues at that time in the room weighed less than me and had such sick grins across their face.
:-( If THAT is not depressing, what is?

During my pregnancy I lost about five kilos (I was overweight by seven kilos pre-pregnancy). So i was superthrilled at one great side effect of my pregnancy was that i actually LOST weight. Most of my family and friends had expected me to pile on at least 15 kilos because i love sweets and fried foods. But Sonny Boy made sure mamma threw up everything she ate right through till she got to the labour room almost.

I even managed to stave off the weight after getting back to work, posibly because I was still nursing him. Then I stopped. In the initial months after the delivery I was on a rather strict "confinement diet" (any Indian woman from an orthodox and traditional family will know what i'm talking about). But I had lost my appetite (from post-partum Blues) and actually didn't get around to eating much. My dear dad and hubby would occassionally sneak in foods i craved -- chips, puffs, spicy veg stuffed buns from the bakery, and even a burger once!

But once i came back to work, i would sneak-eat bhel puri and samosas, and masala dosas outside. Sneak eat because I was blackmailed every time the lil one took ill to not eat any food from outside home, not eat fried and other spicy food. :-)

But once I stopped nursing him, it was almost like i broke free. I ate, rather binged, on all my old favourites with a vengeance.

Now, that's showing. I knew it all along that i was gaining weight. I wasnt fitting into clothes that i could wear after i had Sonny Boy. So there. The knowledge was there. But i wasn't ready to act on it.

But now, when the doctor very sweetly (and genuinely at that) smiled at me and cooly said "You're ONLY 10 kg overweight. But it's ok. You can cut down oily food, exercise and try lose one kilo a month" it was a stinging slap on my face.

I've started to pile on more vegetables on my plate. Am planning to slowly phase out rice at dinnertime (which is very difficult coz rice is my comfort food). Trying to see if I can eat fruit for dinner (over a period of time).... oh it's so difficult. Just when I decide this, people are suddenly visiting and bringing gifts of ...food!

But I will try. Control portion sizes, type of food, change eating timing..and yes EXERCISE. Fellow mothers, pray for me.

KITCHEN WARS ...where M-I-L is always the victor

I fail to understand why mothers-in-law are wired the way they are.
What makes them treat their sons so differently from their daughters-in-law?
Why is it acceptable for a son-in-law to get away with saying "I can't live with your parents. Period." How come we daughters-in-law get the cold turkey treatment if we ever say the same?

My MIL has just been putting me through such a devastating family drama, and the centrepoint of our war -- from where we've both been shooting our volley of words -- is the kitchen.
I like her. She's been good and kind overall.

But what i don't understand is why I must make all the compromises all the time... specially in the kitchen. If i take three steps down the path to make certain changes to suit her, I also expect her to take at least two steps to make some modification in her kitchen rituals, and not waste food.

I also believe in "doing as the Romans do in Rome" so when I'm visiting her, I always adhere to her kitchen style, rules, etc etc. But when she comes visiting, it is just plain unacceptable for her to make some adjustments. Why is there such a great resistance to change?

I have certain pots and vessels for certain foods and it's really unacceptable for me when she uses my curd-making vessel to boil tea!!! It's seasoned for a purpose and I always make it a point to set things aside and tell her before leaving for work, but it's like talking to a wall. The tea will be made in that same vessel ONLY.

She needs food made fresh -- once in the morning and once again at night. I don't have that kind of time. One meal is all i can handle. So i organise a cook. MIL refuses to put away the noon's leftovers in the refrigerator. She believes such food gives her a stomach ache. So I invite her to make for herself whatever she wants, fresh. She doesnt want to cook. If i keep something in the fridge and ask her to put it out by evening for some natural de-frosting, she won't. "Because I don't eat it" is the explanation i get!!! Well, I eat it. But who's listening?

All this is still fine. What I hate is her throwing away leftovers, saying it's spoilt. I don't believe in wasting food, not when you see so many people in the world having nothing much to eat. It's not like I make large quantities either. I don't mind refridgerating and eating the food a day later.
And so my battle continues. Never once will the sons even suggest that perhaps she could comply with keeping food in the fridge even if she doesn't want to eat it. All of it doesnt have to sit out in the sun and rot. Her dear son(s) always supoort her and tell me I must not take these issues seriously and let her just throw the food away. It's no big deal, I've been told.

From where I come, that's blasphemy.
MIL created a scene one day, said some nasty things about my pareents, and walked out... now she will come to town but won't stay with us. She'll go over to the other son. I'm ok with it. It keeps us off each other's "danger" territory and we're back to our old easy cordial relationship. But my husband mopes. Goes off food and talking to me when she's in town...life sucks.

I am now this mean daughter-in-law who refused to adjust with her MIL, who quarrelled and split up the family over some "trivial food issues".

God!! you can never please everybody...or for that matter, anybody.

Recipe for peanut curd/yoghurt...a vegan special

I didn't know this...that one can make peanut curd! I mean, peanut butter is a part of my life, so is peanut chutney and the famous masala peanuts etc. But this was like ....WOW. For me it was a fantastic prospect, and a "first". (Maybe vegans already know this...I haven't Googled it yet).

I'm just back from a very dramatic experience at a holistic retreat where I was on a completely no-oil diet (yes, it's possible to cook traditional Indian food completely without oil) and a vegan one at that (no dairy products whatsoever).



The Wise Woman taught me how to make it and I want to put it down for myself (and anyone else who wants to try) before I forget.

1. Soak raw peanuts overnight (try a small quanitty to figure out if it turns out right the first time).

2. Churn it in a mixie/blender with a little water (if the peanuts have soaked up all the water).

3. Strain it in a thin muslin cloth to get the peanut "milk ".

4. Heat the milk and when it's lukewarm (like how you set regular milk-curd), drop in a small piece of muslin in which is tied some cooked tamarind (setting agent). If you like you can add a spoon of regular dairy curd to set it (instead of tamarind), but it would defeat the point of the yoghurt being dairy-free then.



Psst: And it's supposed to set much faster than curd. I'm gonna try it some weekend. :-)



And i didn't know you can made tadka/oggarne/seasoning without oil. Just splutter the mustard/jeera directy in a heated pan. Season your pan well for a few days and you can make dosa/chila/pancakes without any oil.



But I must admit it was a very difficult transition to make and a phenomenal change to accept -- even if it was for a day or two. Our tastebuds so eaily absorb the joy of all things oily that I was mentally craving fat!!!!!

The F word that kids hate

It's a word I suspect if Sonny Boy hears, he just understands what it implies, and clams up.

What is it with food and toddlers? Pah!

Right now I'm going crazy. He won't eat breakfast. If the all-powerful almighty that he is, decides to have a mid-morning snack, ummm he may. He'll think about it, he'll decide...he'll see. He may touch it, play with it a bit. But eat????!!

Oh no...one does not EAT food! How ridiculous.

It is something that's best left plastered and pasted on mommy's dress, on her jewellery, in her hair, in his own hair, on his t-shirt and shorts, rubbed on the floor or table, (and yes, smearing ketchup IN his ear is his favourite mamma trigger).

He's been showing an eagerness sometimes to eat his own dinner, which I'm very glad to let him do, because it involves, actually, EATING! But, somewhere down the line, he decides it's so boring sitting in one place and putting food in his mouth.

So he'll settle in my lap, and the plastering of food begins. If i object, he heads straight for the walls and bedsheets!

He wakes up too late to head for babysitting and refuses to have anything but some milk. And when he's done with baby-sitting (where he snacks a bit) he won't have anything to do with breakfast.

So FOOD is becoming my obsession. How do I get in more into him? How do I get in nutritious stuff? He outright rejects fruits and veggies and if theyr'e masked in a milkshake or parantha, he spits it out. He's also a great detective of hidden tastes, I figured.

The Wise One sits on the potty and even tells me that his poop will come out hard if he doesnt eat fruits and veggies. But that knowledge is left behind, I think, in the potty, with the poop, once he's done.

I try to make peas look yummy by popping them sensationally into my mouth and making those "Oh this is so yummy" faces and noises. On that day, he chooses to balk at peas. On other days, he'll eat them just fine.

I read on many parenting sites that you must keep a food journal (tells you if the tot is eating adequate amounts of all food groups. Did it for about a week-and-half and that week he really behaved. (He must have seen me making notes!!)

And if all this doesn't make me sound like a paranoid (and therefore normal?) mum, what else can?

10 Tips for travelling with toddlers

1. Be ready for surprises! Yes, as much as you can possibly be. They sleep when you're excited about a view and they're excited when you're exhausted. They'll hate the sea when all you want them to do is embrace the vast expanses of water. That's step one - mental preparation.

2. Hunger strikes are a great way for toddlers to protest, I guess. Protest against new environments, people and new food. So be prepared to see your kid seemingly starve himself and freak you out in the process. Keep the liquids flowing and going into them at least. Prevents dehydration. Milk, water, juice are quite universally available.

3. No-go-potty is an inevitable result of the above protest. No input, no output. And if your kid is used to a certain potty or potty seat don't forget to carry it along. They won't poop till they're on familiar ground.

4. If your toddler is a real picky eater, like mine (and most toddlers), DON'T FORGET to carry non-peridshable favourite foods. Even if it's junk. In a remote place it comes handy and your tot won't starve at least. I would say if you're flying short distance or doing a road trip short distance carry perishables too if you have access to a fridge at your holiday spot.

5. Call your hotel/resort in advance and ask if your kid's staples are available. If it's not, it'll help you carry stuff that you won't get but your child is sure to ask for. I thought tots just adjust and go with the flow when on vacation. Uh huh. No chance. They like the routine and familiar and will not budge. (At least most of them. I envy those parents whose kids eat whatever's on the buffet!)

6. Don't forget emergency medication. Though it's a hassle to carry umpteen number of bottles that leak, you'll be thanking yourself if you have medicines on hand, if, god forbid, things go wrong. Don't forget to carry something your doctor has recommended for small cuts and bruises for the kid, depending on the system of medicine you follow. Also take something for internal injuries -- kids have an amazing tendency to bump themselves (especially on the forehead) against furniture in unfamiliar hotel territory.

7. Favourite shoes (to make sure they walk willingly), clothes (no new trials on vacation), toys (to bring that smile onto their face), and definitely, his blanket/shawl. Maybe even photos of grandparents if that's who they are with when back home. Chances are they'll miss them and be happy to see their pictures. My boy just drove us mad insisting he wanted to go to grandpa's when at the beach!!

8. Favoutite music/books and definitely crayons and paper/book. Maybe a new puzzle or toy to add a holiday surprise and remember the holiday by. Maybe a toy camera for them to go "click" every time you do! Or they'll be fighting for yours.

9. I would also suggest, if you're travelling in India, that you carry along a scrubber and some liquid dishwash sachets (like Vim)to clean up your tot's favourite cutlery if you're taking that too. And at the cost of sounding like a cheapie, I also carry some sachets of clothes washing powder. I'd hate to pay 60 bucks or some such ehxhorbitant amount to have my child's underwear laundered, if he peed in it. Most hotels have running hot water. At least you can rinse out his undies with soap and water.

10. Kid's sunscreen if you're going to a hot place. Lots of woolies if it's a cold one. And sachets of whatever drinking-powder you use to mix in his milk. (I know it's all random and in no order...but these are things i remembered from the recent vacation and needed to put it down for myself, before I forget, for the next vacation, if I ever dare take one again!!)

What do they put in chips and Maggi????!!!

I must confess my sin first. I love chips and Maggi. Yes, I do.

But what's in it that makes it so addictive for children? I mean, I thought for an adult like me it takes some time, some conditioning of the tastebuds, to actually develop a taste for such "comfort food".

I can't understand how, when I try to put healthy new foods into dear S's mouth, he'll always turn his face away. But the first time i showed him chips and Maggi, he was so willing to try it!! No reluctance to open mouth, no protest! And one try was enough to get him hooked. It's almost like there's an addictive substance that's added in it that makes kids keep going back to this kind of stuff.

Is it the mere sight of these foods that works on their psyche? Wow...I just don't get it.

I must take comfort in the fact that at least he says no to ketchup sometimes, I suppose!

And now it's come upon me to decide what to put in his little tiffin box at playhome (yes, yes, I have read innumerable articles about that) -- how you don't send junk, no chips, no Maggi. Send cut fruits, healthy vegetable pieces. Fat chance that my boy's going to eat that though...

Will definitely give it my healthiest shot. And like all good mammas, wait and watch. ;-)

Of vada pav and wine :-)

Yes, I'm back I'm back I'm back...after a VACATION!
Yipeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee finally

The sun and sand have hopefully worked magic on my mind. (So also MIL's presence ...hahahahaha)
And it's with great back-to-school resistance that I've turned up at work today.

A vacation made of all vague things -- of burying my feet in sand, of drinking fruity vodka, of long walks to the beach in the sultry sun, of making new friends, of laughing at odd things, of biting into cold vada pav and sipping strong red wine while feeding S his dinner, of lots of therapeutic shopping, of LATE mornings spent sprawled in bed with dear S, and watching him suddenly pick up language like a pro. Of brushing teeth in the open backyard looking up at a ridiculous five-star hotel looming large from behind, of trying to read a book while S slept...

Of meals that did not have to be cooked and surprise meals that had to be cooked for the joint family.....oh it was so much...work? Hahaha maybe, but right now I'm just heady and giddy from the holdiay, so it can't all have been bad. ;-)

Acceptance....

...is when you finally give away those pre-baby jeans that you've been clinging on to, in the hope that one day you'll be able to squueze your wobbly stomach into

...is also when you go to a plus size store and buy a new pair of jeans paying a hefty price for gowing hefty

...is when you know your episiotomy has left you scarred a certain way, for life

...is when you go home knowing that a cold facewash and a hot coffee are not the things that will greet you when yo get back home from work

...is when you begin to treasure your time at your workplace more than your home because it's the only time you are valued for your skills and for being "you"

10 things that are sure to happen with you and child

Murphy's Law "Anything that can go wrong, will go wrong" applies best to situations set around your child and yourself (yeah once you're a mother, it's intrinsically linked).

1. Your child will have that One Big Fall in life. Most probably it will be on his head. And you can be assured it'll happen when you're just out of reach and mostly, when you (The Careless Mother) is around. Never around Daddy. No way!

2. When you have close friends over, your child (whom you've described to friends as a little devil) is sure to be on his best behaviour, proving that Mummy is a big liar and he, an angel. And just when your friends have left the party and are texting you "Whay do you complain so much? He's so cute!" or "He's such an adorable darling" is when he'll throw the week's worst tantrum. Around you the post-celebration mess is waiting to be cleaned up.

3. You are looking forward to a quiet Sunday. And a hectic work week after that. The nanny informs you she's not coming a few days. Emergency. The house-help says she's going to her village for her niece's daughter's ear-piercing ceremony. Your in-laws decide it's a good time to visit. You inevitably fall sick.

4. Your dear darling child has had a running nose most of last week, has thrown up phelgm with food after most meals, and has finally settled down with all the medication you've pumped in. You can almost be assured that just as you're breathing a sigh of relief that he's tided over it. You hear the bursts of fart that herald the loosies.

5. You suddenly feel guilty you havent been paying too much attention to his nutrition. You need to make this most healthy breakfast for the little one. You've put together this multi-veggie upma, raagi porridge, made some mango milkshake. Even if he has some pickings from each of this, you tell yourself, you've done your bit. The little one wakes up with a sunny smile and asks for Maggi.

6. You've told the world that your child's a poor eater. Hardly takes in a few spoonfulls at every meal, and that too after much fussing. But the day your best friend lands home with her baby and you're both feeding them their meal together, that's when your darling will eagerly wolf down all the food -- no protest, no crankiness -- as if you've starved him three whole days. He'll even smile and eat veggies!

7. You've prepared hime for his outing to the restaurant. Told him all about how you're going there to eat, we'll sit on a chair etc etc. He'll land there, scream excitedly "Food! Food!". Keep asking every passer-by for Maggi. Pull down the table mats, throw the spoons and forks below the table, refuse to sit on the high chair provided (though he'll gladly do it at home), stand up on the plush upholstery with his muddy sandals, climb up the table, and eat noodles, string by string with his hands. And clap for himself! Needless to say, yours is the only kid at the restaurant doing it.

8. You're looking forward to a vacation. A short break, really. You think you are getting the little darling ready for life, letting him have a look at the beautiful world outside. He decides it's time to go on strike -- he won't eat, pee or poop on most of the holiday. So instead of relaxing and winding down, you're all wound back up over his sudden withdrawal from routine life...and lack of requisite amount of pee in the diaper.

9. A play date sounds like an exciting opportunity to let your shy guy socialise. You're hoping that your child is as excited as you are. Problem is, most often, you and the other mother are the only folks excited. He decides he's going to pluck all toys from the other kid, scream, and spend most of the pecious "date time" whining. Other kid is on the same wavelenght! By the time you meet again, he's forgotten the kid anyway, and the process starts all over again.


10. You're all set to go to the park. It's a great sunny day. You're even in the mood to pack some picnic lunch. You're all set to go and no surprise dark clouds have gathered in the sky either. You're finally getting dressed after having fought the dear child to get his clothes and diaper on. Ting Tong...it's those cheesy relatives who land at your doorstep and settle down comfortably for a chat.