Does a second child make your first one happier?

It's crazy that I'm even thinking about it. And those who know me and how I protest a second child will sadistically say "Aaah see, we knew you would come around to this..."

My point is, does having a second child benefit the older one, and, eventually the second child too? I'm beginning to think my little fella is lonely. When I say benefit, I mean from the company.

Two things happened yesterday. It was Ugadi, we were all at home. Suddenly Sonny said "Where's my tamma paapa (younger brother/baby)?" He has a doll that he calls that -- TP -- I'll call him. But he doesn't play with that doll all the time. He just lies around the house randomly mostly. But suddenly Sonny's love for TP overflows. Yesterday he held him and brought him on teh bike to my parents' place. There he put him on his lap and put him to bed. On teh bike, he held his hand on his head saying "Otherwise the sun will hit him hard on the head!"!!!! I was a Melting Mommy.

I asked him "So do you really want a TP (younger brother)? A real one? Not this doll..." And he promptly said "No, I want this doll TP ONLY." I was in splits.

Later in the evening I took him to my best friend's place. She too has an only child -- a daughter -- and after their usual measuring up of each other, trying to snatch toys from each other routine, they were both jumping around in the apartment courtyard so happily together.

I was honestly happy to see him play WITH SOMEONE HIS OWN AGE.
It's such a frustrating life. I can't take him to playgroup because I'm hardly ever home. My parents refuse to; they prefer the arrangement of a nanny/maid to that of day care/play group.
I've only seen Sonny play with older folk.
I'm feeling guilty that I'm killing his childhood by dumping him with adults all day long.

There are some older kids in our apartment but he's barely there. And there are no kids around where my folks stay -- which is where he is most of the time.

At the cost of sounding stupid and crazy i feel like having a second child so that my first has company!! But it doesn't sound right at all. That messes up my mind further.

Sonny's going through a phase where he's being so difficult and stubborn and cranky and headstrong. And like in India everyone says to anyone who's a bit "off the track" in adult years -- "shaadi kara do, sab theek ho jaayega", now everyone says to me "have another baby, he'll become ok". I'm actually giving it some thought now. Should I, would I, could I? Do I really want to? Ufffffffff

Isn't it time for the second? No?!! Tch tch...

Dear S's second birthday is coming up and it's that point in my life when one more BIG question is thrown, very casually, in my face. Very often.
"So when's your next baby coming?" or "Now that he's two, don't you think he needs company?" Or simply "Oh you must have two kids...look at me." Or "My second one arrived just in time for my first baby's second birthday."
It's all about timing. Keep the distance. Your two years are up. Time to face the nosy relatives.
I'd love for Sonny Boy to have company. And not have teh fairly lonely life I've had. I'd love for him to have someone to grow up with, to play with, to share his joys and sorrows, his toys, his smiles.....oooh yes. I'd love for all that to happen. But the kid must just automatically take care of herself. Ya howwwl as much as you want. Flare your nostrils. Grunt at my obnoxiousness. But I'm game for a second for very selfish reasons, but honestly have no energy to care for her. Which is why I can't have her.
Her, I say. That's another reason. If I ever EVER have a second, it has to be a girl. And since God gives me no guarantees on that, I'm taking no chances. I'm going mad with one boy. Two will ensure I lose even that tiny bit of sanity left in me.
But i like the nerve of relatives who just assume I'll have a second. "Why not?" is scathingly whipped out in my face when I smile and try to say "No, I'm not having another." Like it's a sin. No offence meant to mothers of two, three, or more children. In fact the more number of kids you have, I worship you so many times more because i don't have the fortitude for it.
Some pity me in response. Most start off on their glorious (or rather smooth) experience of the second. They reassurinly tell me that THIS ONE will be easy because you've been through it all(yeah right...I'm not getting tricked again!)

But if I, the mother, is unwilling , because I'll fail to giver her my best-est, I don't think it's anybody's bsuiness to worry for me and for my son.
I wouldn't like to give someone whom I bring into this world anything but my best.