Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Depressed :-(

I'm soooooooooooooooooo down today
I let litte S fall, yet again, from the bed.
This is his second fall. I was there, so was Hubby and...it just happened. He seems ok as of now, but it's scary. The last time around we rushed him for a CT scan and had him seen by a neurosurgeon; it was all just so traumatic.

I blame myself for this stupid stupid mistake. Should have learnt my lesson from the first time around. I'm ashamed with my carelessness.

Why do such things happen? Why are you tested so often?

Whatever happens, however much i crib, it hurts to see him hurt, this little darling of mine. SORRY


Anonymous said...

I know its difficult but you have to let go..its common at this age..we cannot keep our eyes on them all the time..we are not GOD..they need to get independent and its all a part of growing up..dont feel so guilty..cheer up..you are a wonderful mother..

Sakthi said...

It really hurts much when our child is hurt. This happens with all the kids and its one of the first teaching of god(or say nature) to make the child realise the action and reaction process.Really I also feel bad that God teaches us unforgetable lessons in a very hard way.
You were child will know now that it hurts when we fall and will be careful when he starts to walk. I too remember that I cried with my daughter when she cried hearing the cooker whistle should when she was 30 days old.Seeing me , my mother too cried... It was really very funny incident we recall together now..
Don't feel bad about this small things. I feel you have not yet overcome your post portum depression yet. My sister had for almost 4-5 aftr her child birth and I had it for almost 2 years.
I used to fear intially after my child birth that someone will take away my kid away from me.. Its all hormone problem. Be cheerful, positive and engage yourself some hubby. Parneting is a beatiful art for a woman and all woman has that skill in them.
It time enjoy your baby being a kid yourself... You are a mother with a very loving heart.. your child will be really proud of you.. take care of yourself to take care of the little flower in your beautiful garden...Happy Parenting...

Forever mother said...

Hi Anonymous and Sakthi,
Sorry for the delay in replying. I'm very tech un-savvy and had a problem posting my own comments on my own blog! Today, I finally fixed it.

Thanks for taking the time from your own everyday mummy schedules to share your thoughts.

Yes, I'm trying to let go, but it's hard, as you have already experienced.

And yes, Sakthi, we all tend to remember how we first cried for our child when we cut their nails and it bled or other such goof-ups.

Thanks for all the verbal support
Forever Mother